Sunday, May 6, 2012

Self Reflection Sunday

Hi everyone, I hope y'all's weekend has been great so far. Yesterday I went to my niece Olivia's 1st birthday party and watched the Cotto vs Mayweather fight and then my niece Athens spent the night. Today Athens wants to go get her nails done, so we're going to get manis. She chose the pink from the Every Woman Collection and I'm using Vibrant from the same collex. I'll post those sometime this week.

Today's Self Reflection Sunday is about confidence. I've never had confidence issues, on the contrary I think I had so much confidence that I came across as arrogant. While I've never and don't think of myself as better than anyone else. I've always felt that there wasn't anything that I couldn't do and I just did it. When I was a little girl we had one of those small swimming pools and all my cousins would splash around and go under water, just having fun like kids do. Well, me, I'd just sit and watch them have fun, because I was afraid of going under water. When we had to go inside, I sat by the window and stared at that pool and said I want to go under water too! So, I marched myself outside and sat in that pool for what seemed an eternity and then took the plunge! I felt an overwhelming sense of confidence that I did it.

We had a two level storage house on one side of the property we lived on. My brother, sister, and my cousins would climb the ladder up to the attic part of the house. I was too afraid. But, when they left, I said I'm going up there! I didn't think about how I was going to get down. I think I sat up in that attic for about an hour contemplating how I was going to get down. Finally, my mom starting looking for me and I thought, well I gotta for sure get down somehow. I sighed and said just don't look down. My mom was so mad I was up there by myself. Haha!

Another time, I was on the road with my cousin's bike. I think I was too small yet to have a two wheeled bike, but I wanted to know how to ride a bike too. So, I'm standing with the bike thinking how on earth am I gonna do this? As I was standing in the road Jessie Gonzales (an old family friend) was going to my house and found me there and asked me if I wanted him to teach me to ride the bike and me being me said no, but could you just get me on the bike. He did and then left or so I thought. He stayed by a tree and watched me teach myself how to ride that bike and to make sure I didn't hurt myself.

All of this to say, I still have an abundance of confidence, but I'm much more aware of the fact that my confidence comes from God and not me. Even now, I think to myself, how selfish of me to think I could accomplish anything on my own. I think I'm much more positive in the way I carry myself and hope I no longer come across as arrogant. I'm still a work in progress, but I hope I never feel so confident that I've reached my full potential because that would mean I don't need God in my life (I do.) It would also mean (to me) that I'm content and don't want anymore than I do. And, I want to so much more that my cup runneth over!

Have a great day!